every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
