Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize