So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
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On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
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my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?