FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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