Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
