she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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