There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
