You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
