You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
