dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
