Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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