i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
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