so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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