You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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