Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
