you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
