THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
