im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
