We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
