She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
