i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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