at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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