sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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