YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
