If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
