they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize