You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
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