He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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