i don't plan on having that self control this summer
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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