this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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