omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
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