woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
