Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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