My hair reeks of homosexuality.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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