Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize