***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
