Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Is it because I queefed?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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