How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
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FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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