; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize