We're like a lot better than the average bears
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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