Is it normal to miss your booty call?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Sorry my hands just texted you
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
