Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
This toilet bowl is my home.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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