accomplished twins. life is a go
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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