How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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