you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I need moral support for this bender
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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