theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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