Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize