Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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