I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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