he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
