So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
