I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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